Wow, Cobra Starship. Wow.
Everyone’s favorite dead-serious-about-being-jokey scenester, Gabe Saporta, is releasing a third Cobra Starship album this year, entitled Hot Mess. Chances are, it’ll have a few memorable hooks, lots of processed sounds, tons of Patrick Stump vocal overdubs, and an overall aura of smugness. Because, you know, Saporta used to be all intense and emo when he was in Midtown, until one day he realized that music should be about fun and expensive neon clothing and mock gang signs. Or have you not heard about that decision? It’s not like Cobra Starship has built its entire musical career after that one aesthetic joke or anything.
I have to admit, I’m unfair to Mr. Saporta. Just because he comes from the Dane Cook School of People Who Just Look Like Douchebags doesn’t mean that he is. But come on,
Anyway, congrats to all of Cobra Starship. As Saporta posted on his blog, the band’s new single, “Good Girls Go Bad” has reached #38 on the Billboard charts, Saporta’s first time in the Top 40. It might have taken Gossip Girl’s Leighton Meester and an instrumental track that sounds a lot like Lady Gaga’s “Just Dance” to get there, but hey, whatever it takes to get to the top. Seriously, though, this song is like a less offensive, less catchy version of that 3Oh!3 song (and not this piece of shit one, oh my God), or a Lady Gaga song with a dude singing and trading fake cheerleader raps with a prime time soap star. And being really douchey. Fangs up.
